Balloon Ascension Day

Hooray! It’s balloon day! Balloons rule! Go balloons.

First of all, I think balloons are an underused decoration item. Now all anyone wants is lazers and smoke machines and guitar solos. I prefer the balloons. Helium is the greatest of all gases. See ya Xenon. Wouldn’t want to be ya Argon. Helium: Supreme of all Gases. Anyway, moving on. I sent balloons into the atmosphere.

I sent my sister to the store. She returned with some blue balloons. Perfectly helium filled balloons.

Balloon Ascension Day got me thinking about what happens when you send a balloon up into the sky. Where does it go? Does it eventually get tangled in something? Does some stranger find a deflated balloon in their yard? Does a dolphin accidentally eat it? Who knows, but balloons rule. Bottom line.

I went to an engagement party last night with a giant balloon arch. Or as I like to call it, a gateway to joy! Balloon arches are made in order for people to take pictures underneath. And the only time you have balloon arches is if you are at a great party, prom, or you work at the balloon store.

One time, fall of my junior year, I was in charge of an event at Kappa. I was getting a balloon arch. Now, balloon arches aren’t small. They aren’t entirely large either, but they just aren’t a conveniently shaped entity. I had to fit this balloon arch into the back of my car. Now, my car isn’t small. It isn’t entirely large either, but it just isn’t a conveniently sized entity. Especially to transport a balloon arch.

So I get to Party Galaxy. A great name for a party place, but that’s beside the point. I get there. I get inside and I lay eyes on The Arch. I don’t know WHAT I was thinking. Clearly my sweet, blueish greenish Jeep Liberty was going to struggle with the ability to temporarily house this awkward monstrosity. The lady assures me otherwise.

I carry the arch outside. Holding each end of the arch in each of my hands. The arch is looming over me. It’s slightly windy. I felt like I might blow away. Literally. I really thought I might. So then becomes the awkward getting the arch into the car scene. Do you put the ends in first? Do you put one end in first? Do you put the top in first? I didn’t know. I went with top in first. It seemed fine. However, as soon as you put one part in another part comes out. It was awkward. It took some time. Mrs. Party Galaxy had to help me. But I eventually got the arch into my car.

So now, I’m driving home. With the arch. My rear-view mirror visibility is non-existent. I felt like the people near me were looking in my windows judging me. There is no way to handle balloons with dignity. While they are awesome and underused, they are underused for a reason. You have to give up your dignity to hold a bunch of balloons.

I leave you with the following pictures from my balloon release. Quality is shifty due to the snow in Bartlesville. Also, due to the snow, the balloons did not exactly ascend but more or less migrated down Claremont Drive. So here are the pics:

My face looks like a fifth balloon.

My coat makes me look like an orb.



I promise I’m not orb shaped.


1 Comment

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One response to “Balloon Ascension Day

  1. Have you ever had balloons pop in your car while driving? I have. It’s a major problem, as you might imagine. I can’t believe you got an entire balloon arch in your car. I have a small car (okay I drive a clown car) and I once carried all the balloons for a child’s birthday party. Some of them popped. It was a bad deal. I’ll probably never do that again.

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