Chocolate Cake Day

I went into this day with extremely high hopes. I was going to make one rocking chocolate cake. A layer cake if you will. I was going to ice the layers into sheer perfection. Chocolate buttercream was going to be everywhere it was going to be pure bliss. Literally, it was going to be the greatest thing you’ve ever seen.

I baked my layers. I made homemade chocolate buttercream. I was prepared. I let the layers cool completely. If you don’t the icing melts and things get crazy. Real crazy. One time, when my mom was baking a three layer cake, it became a two layer cake. It was tasty. And she was totally excited about it being a two layer cake instead of a three layer cake, but that is a different story.

Anyway, I went to dinner with a friend and came home to get my cake icing on. Well, here is where things go south. Well not exactly south, but perhaps in a westward direction. So my cake was headed west. Out into the wild frontier of baked goods.

I’m not 100 % sure how the proper stacking of cake layers goes. It’s one of those world secrets like how to use yeast properly, how to bake anything with phylo dough, why you always need new socks or tetanus shots. (Tetanus is a scam. You name me one person that has Tetanus. Exactly. No one) So, where the layers touch, the edges did not. Not even close. You see the problem. Whilst icing the layers, the edge of the cake clearly had a large gap. So, I filled it with icing. Duh.

What else was I to do? Leave it? Yeah, right. It was frosted to best of my ability and I cut a single piece and ate part of it. And then I fell asleep on the couch. But I was sitting there not laying there. So now my neck is weird. And my cake isn’t pretty. And I had such high hopes!

I sat at my desk at my Big Girl job and visions of chocolate cake danced in my head. Here is was I was imagining all day long.

The prettiest cake at the ball.

And this is what I ended up with….

 

Happy Birthday to the ground.

I mean it’s a tasty cake. It’s sitting in my kitchen right now. You are more than welcome to come have a piece. It just isn’t what I wanted it to look like. I don’t like not being good at things. In the last two days I have had extremely good luck with my cooking endeavors. I am practically becoming a professional Italian. I made eggplant parm and chicken alfredo and they ruled. But the cake just didn’t. It was just lacking. That’s fine. I’m ok with that. (I’m really not. I’m kinda frustrated about it. But saying I’m ok with that makes me feel better…sort of.)

not too shabby.

I did realize one thing during cake day. I watch cake shows on Food Network and they are always yammering about how the cake isn’t working or the icing isn’t right. I always think they are giant drama queens. Until now. I get it. I get that cake kinda sucks to work with. Dear Bakers on Food Network, Sorry. Love, Kate.

I have one story to leave you with that will hopefully make you laugh. Ok, two stories. I was working on a document at Big Girl Job and one part of it was titled ‘attendance breakdown’. And then I kept saying ‘dance breakdown’. And I couldn’t stop laughing. I was alone. Laughing at ‘dance breakdown’. Please don’t judge me. Especially for the next story.

I got out of Big Girl Job and I was business casually as usual. I was walking downtown from the Chamber to my car in the parking garage.

SIDENOTE: the parking garage that I park in is literally the exact same garage that the opening scene of The Dark Knight was filmed in. They didn’t tell you they were on location in Oklahoma for that scene, but they were. The spiral driving part is nuts. I feel like Bruce Wayne is going to just pop up out of nowhere.

Anyway, I’m walking downtown. I call Alex, because I always call Alex and I said the following:

Me: Oh Hullo.
Alex: Hiiii.
Me: I’m walking downtown. I just left my Big Girl Job.
Alex: Ohh fancy.
Me: I feel fancy. I’m business casually and downtown in the middle of the day. Walking across streets.
Alex: ….silence…. Walking across streets?
Me: Things are weird. I’m sorry.

So yeah, I said walking across streets. I’m not proud of it. But it happened. I am sorry that this is so late. I fell asleep… I am going to post the February list tonight! Check out the This Month’s Celebrations page later on. Get jazzed.

Sincerely,

Walking across streets rules.

PS: I got cocoa powder in my eyeballs. I don’t suggest it.

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