…in time gone by. When hope was high and life worth living. Well, that’s from Les Mis and I haven’t exactly seen it or read it, but it’s Dream Day and that’s what I thought of.
But I will tell you about my dreams. My hopes and dreams and the regular weird dreams I have whilst sleeping. I assure you that my dreams whilst sleeping are much more hilarious than my hopes and dreams, but I’ll share both because I’m a sharer.
Sleep Dream: One time I dreamed that I was fighting monster alien dinosaurs. Imagine the weird robots from War of the Worlds, that really awful Tom Cruise movie. Now imagine the raptors from Jurassic Park. Now imagine the Monstar from Space Jam. The small red one that had Muggsy Bogues skills. Put all of those together and that’s what I was fighting. However I was on a monorail and the monorail was in a field. Things were strange. It was the end of the world type situation. Analyze that please someone.
Hopes and Dreams: Someday when I’m married with children I want to have one dish that my children’s friends will say, “Oh man, so-and-so’s mom makes the best _______.” I haven’t found out what exactly my dish of fame will be, but I’m on my quest. I’m hoping that I find it soon so I have lots and lots of years to perfect it.
Sleep Dream: This was the scariest dream I’ve ever had. I had it when I was probably 6 years old. It’s one of those dreams that I couldn’t forget. The thing is, it’s not scary at all. But it was reoccurring. Two scientists were dressed in black looking out over a field. The man had a clipboard and a pen in his hand. The woman was holding nothing. A guy, that they didn’t see, crawled up next to them in the ditch and switched the pen in the guys hand. But this pen had super glue on it. So it stuck to the guy’s hand. I thought it was terrifying. It’s clearly not. Again, analyze away.
Hopes and Dreams: I want to live overseas. I’m not entirely sure where (that’s a lie, I want to live in England), but Europe as a whole would be fine. I don’t know the logistics that this would take. I’m quite happy here in Chicago/America and I have things that are keeping me here fairly permanently, but that’s why this is on the hopes and dreams list and not the logical and achievable list.
And now for Bow Tie Day. I think bow ties are great. They say, “Hey, I do know someone that knows how to tie this.” They are unusual and interesting and I like them. I’m going to attempt to tie the bow tie bow. I don’t have a bow tie to use, but I’ll attempt with a scarf.
Well, I attempted with a black sash that I tried to tie around a Texadelphia cup (I miss you so Norman). Turns out, it’s really difficult. I got one decent bow out of it, but my realization was that the instructions online are strange. They give you 8 or 9 steps when really they should give you about 20. They do magic tricks with the tie in between the shown steps. I think I did it, but I don’t have a bow tie so the shape was off and it was weird looking. I submit that Daniel Craig comes to my apartment and teaches me how to do this. I’m sure he learned how to tie one as part of a method acting preparation for being James Bond.
So that’s that. And praise the Lord, I finally found someone to color my hair here in Chicago. If you haven’t already heard of salonapprentice.com you should check it out. Stylists in training offer discounted prices if you come get your hair done for part of their training. $30 for high lights, I think I can handle that. So on Wednesday, my hair will cease to look like a trailer park hooker. My roots will be quelled underground for another 2 months. I’m just delighted.
My 6 year old self was a curious human.